Uh, well, obviously he taught me how to fight! And, I guess by proxy, I also learned how to play poker from him? I'm also really good at budgeting now. And how to balance a checkbook! Oh, and how to find a good mark!! Oh and - wait, you're not like a cop anymore so it's okay if I'm honest, right? I know how to cheat with taxes.
Don't tell anyone, though! I promise it's not by a lot!
That's why I said "like" a cop! I know you're not proper the fuzz.
So how do we do this? Do we start with the toasting part? I can do that alright. It usually comes out a little crispy, though, and I don't think the French would like that.
Link shakes his head, putting on his apron before going to the fridge to grab the eggs, milk, and butter.]
You don't toast it in a traditional sense. French toast is made by taking thick pieces of bread and dredging them in a milk and egg mixture, then frying them in a pan. Sometimes I like to add a bit of cinnamon to the mixture as well, but usually I'll leave it off so people can add it to their own taste.
[ Allen practically sparkles at him with that realization. If he's being honest, part of the reason he struggles so much with breaking eggs is it's hard to be gentle with his Innocence hand. Especially with something as so finicky as an egg can be. If he could just use his human hand, that would make it easier.
It's bold of Link to teach him something like that without covering the egg-cracking basics, though. Allen doesn't seem to mind. ]
Alright then. We need to crack quite a few eggs to make enough toast for everyone, so let's get started, shall we? We'll start out with learning to crack an egg normally without getting the shells in, and go from there.
[ Allen nods, taking an egg, and then he starts to tap his red hand's nails against the shell. He does this a few times until they inevitably make a dent, to which Allen just... shoves a finger in. He holds the egg over the bowl and just attempts to rip the shell open with his thumb, using the hole as a point of contact.
It... works. Sort of. There's some shell in the egg from where he pushed his finger in to make the hole, but ultimately the separating of the shell went off without a hitch. ]
[Hm. Not bad…but also not good, either. Link sees the problem immediately though, as this is a mistake he used to make.]
You don’t want to use your nail or the edge of a bowl or table to crack the egg. That pushes the shell inside and makes it more likely to come out with the egg.
[He picks up another egg and demonstrates by giving it a careful tap on the flat part of the counter until it cracks, then using both hands to carefully pull the shell halves apart.]
You can also use one of your egg shells to scoop any dropped shell. It’s easier than using a fork or a spoon since the shell wants to stick to the membrane.
[ Allen is taking notes. He is nodding. He takes a second egg and does as Link instructs, and while making sure his touch stays featherlight with his red hand, he's able to crack the egg basically perfectly. No shells, and although this doesn't matter for French toast, even the yolk is intact.
There's a moment where Allen stares into the bowl, astonished. He leans over it a moment to double check it for shells, and upon confirming that all the shells in the bowl are from his prior attempt, he looks at Link and just... beams.
[ He’s the best at cracking eggs. He is so confident because he can totally do this how much harder is cracking it in one hand, really, and besides doing it without his Innocence will surely make it easier and—
Anyway, the egg basically crunches in his hand. After his initial dent in the egg, he tries to force it open there, but he somehow manages to open the ends of the egg before the crack he made and his fingers slip into the egg in the process. His hand is covered in slimy egg goo now. There is no salvaging this. ]
[Ah…Link sighs through his nose and picks up a nearby towel to wipe Allen’s hand, grabbing another bowl to toss the egg shells in.]
It’s difficult. Requires a lot of careful pressure so you don’t break the egg before you’re ready. Would you say you have better control over your right or left hand?
Sure… you’re more disciplined with your hands, though. I’m kinda just… brutish, I guess? For lack of a better word. [ Though, to be fair, one of them does turn into a literal weapon, so it’s hard not to be “brutish”. ]
I’m uh. What’s the word? Amy… Amber… Am bet…? Uh. Both handed! I can use them both as well as the other. The issue is — [ Allen knocks his Innocence against the countertop, and it sounds like Allen is bonking a rock against it. ] — Goes cock-up if I try being gentle with this ‘un.
[He may not have Innocence, but he knows its power. He’s felt it. He wouldn’t begrudge Allen for not being able to do anything delicate with that hand, but…he does think it’s possible.
He takes one more egg and puts it in Allen’s red hand, and then steps over so he’s not quite beside him, but not fully behind him either. With Allen’s hand around the egg, he fits his own hand around the back of Allen’s, placing his fingers in the right position over the shell so he can guide Allen’s hand.
Then he starts to apply pressure to the egg, and by extension, Allen’s hand.]
This way you can feel just the amount of pressure I’m using. Just use your thumb for leverage once you’ve made a crack, and then-
[The egg splits, and Link uses Allen’s fingers to gently pull the shell halves apart.]
It’s easy for him to be led, both because the Critters are still on his head and he doesn’t want to disturb them much, but also just because he does genuinely want to learn. There is something about link being so close with his hand over Allen’s that’s just a tad overwhelming. Were this intentional, Allen may have lied his head back on Link and batted his lashes teasingly at Link — but the thing is that Link isn’t doing this intentionally. He is just like this. So Allen flusters, keeping his gaze ahead and hoping his ears aren’t nearly as red as he cheeks.
“Weren’t you just touching his chest earlier?” That was different. That was valid worry. This? They’re cracking eggs and Link’s fingers feel so soft against the roughness of his Innocence and he feels like he’s going to blow up. There’s a difference. ]
Your hands… are real warm, you know. [ Your Innocence is just cold, babe. ]
[ Let him pull his gloves off with your teeth, bird boy aaAAAAAAAAAA ]
Goodness, no. It's my hand is always sort of cool to touch. But it isn't unpleasant, it just makes warmer things so much more noticeable on me.
[ Allen leans back here, looking fully up to see Link as the top of his head bops against Link's chest, then he lifts both arms over his head to place both hands on Link's cheeks.
And then he squishes them to make his lips puckered. ]
[Don't do this to him you'll turn him gay quicker.
Link blinks, looking down at Allen as he leans back with his head against his chest...only to stiffen when Allen suddenly smooshes his hands against his cheeks as he does.]
[ He clears his throat, and reaches for another egg.
He doesn't drop this one. He also doesn't crack it amazingly??? He does the technique that Link showed him well enough, but the execution just kind of goes poorly. The egg ends up in the bowl, but there's shell bits in there. ]
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2026-03-13 01:55 am (UTC)Don't tell anyone, though! I promise it's not by a lot!
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Date: 2026-03-13 02:11 am (UTC)I'm not a cop...
[Also Cross he's fucking disappointed in you. What have you done to this boy. Link is frog-marching Allen into the kitchen now he is Teaching you.]
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Date: 2026-03-13 02:23 am (UTC)So how do we do this? Do we start with the toasting part? I can do that alright. It usually comes out a little crispy, though, and I don't think the French would like that.
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Date: 2026-03-13 02:39 am (UTC)Link shakes his head, putting on his apron before going to the fridge to grab the eggs, milk, and butter.]
You don't toast it in a traditional sense. French toast is made by taking thick pieces of bread and dredging them in a milk and egg mixture, then frying them in a pan. Sometimes I like to add a bit of cinnamon to the mixture as well, but usually I'll leave it off so people can add it to their own taste.
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Date: 2026-03-13 02:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2026-03-13 02:44 am (UTC)[Link picks up an egg with one hand, then just
squeezes it with his fingers and somehow breaks it open with just the one hand, letting it slide into the waiting bowl he was holding underneath it.]
-with one hand. And see? No shells.
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Date: 2026-03-13 03:05 am (UTC)It's bold of Link to teach him something like that without covering the egg-cracking basics, though. Allen doesn't seem to mind. ]
Brilliant!!!! Yes, I want to do that, too!!!!
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Date: 2026-03-13 03:21 am (UTC)[He'll offer Allen the carton.]
Now, how do you try to do it normally? Show me.
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Date: 2026-03-13 03:40 am (UTC)It... works. Sort of. There's some shell in the egg from where he pushed his finger in to make the hole, but ultimately the separating of the shell went off without a hitch. ]
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Date: 2026-03-13 03:51 am (UTC)You don’t want to use your nail or the edge of a bowl or table to crack the egg. That pushes the shell inside and makes it more likely to come out with the egg.
[He picks up another egg and demonstrates by giving it a careful tap on the flat part of the counter until it cracks, then using both hands to carefully pull the shell halves apart.]
You can also use one of your egg shells to scoop any dropped shell. It’s easier than using a fork or a spoon since the shell wants to stick to the membrane.
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Date: 2026-03-13 04:05 am (UTC)There's a moment where Allen stares into the bowl, astonished. He leans over it a moment to double check it for shells, and upon confirming that all the shells in the bowl are from his prior attempt, he looks at Link and just... beams.
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨ ] I've never done that before!!!!!!
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Date: 2026-03-13 04:08 pm (UTC)Even Link huffs and cracks the slightest smile at that, equal parts shocked and impressed.]
Impressive. Are you sure your calling wasn’t to be a chef? You love food just as much as one.
[He picks up another egg and passes it to Allen.]
Do you want to try it one handed?
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Date: 2026-03-13 04:24 pm (UTC)Anyway, the egg basically crunches in his hand. After his initial dent in the egg, he tries to force it open there, but he somehow manages to open the ends of the egg before the crack he made and his fingers slip into the egg in the process. His hand is covered in slimy egg goo now. There is no salvaging this. ]
— Ah?
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Date: 2026-03-13 05:17 pm (UTC)It’s difficult. Requires a lot of careful pressure so you don’t break the egg before you’re ready. Would you say you have better control over your right or left hand?
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Date: 2026-03-13 05:29 pm (UTC)I’m uh. What’s the word? Amy… Amber… Am bet…? Uh. Both handed! I can use them both as well as the other. The issue is — [ Allen knocks his Innocence against the countertop, and it sounds like Allen is bonking a rock against it. ] — Goes cock-up if I try being gentle with this ‘un.
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Date: 2026-03-13 06:34 pm (UTC)[He may not have Innocence, but he knows its power. He’s felt it. He wouldn’t begrudge Allen for not being able to do anything delicate with that hand, but…he does think it’s possible.
He takes one more egg and puts it in Allen’s red hand, and then steps over so he’s not quite beside him, but not fully behind him either. With Allen’s hand around the egg, he fits his own hand around the back of Allen’s, placing his fingers in the right position over the shell so he can guide Allen’s hand.
Then he starts to apply pressure to the egg, and by extension, Allen’s hand.]
This way you can feel just the amount of pressure I’m using. Just use your thumb for leverage once you’ve made a crack, and then-
[The egg splits, and Link uses Allen’s fingers to gently pull the shell halves apart.]
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Date: 2026-03-13 07:05 pm (UTC)It’s easy for him to be led, both because the Critters are still on his head and he doesn’t want to disturb them much, but also just because he does genuinely want to learn. There is something about link being so close with his hand over Allen’s that’s just a tad overwhelming. Were this intentional, Allen may have lied his head back on Link and batted his lashes teasingly at Link — but the thing is that Link isn’t doing this intentionally. He is just like this. So Allen flusters, keeping his gaze ahead and hoping his ears aren’t nearly as red as he cheeks.
“Weren’t you just touching his chest earlier?” That was different. That was valid worry. This? They’re cracking eggs and Link’s fingers feel so soft against the roughness of his Innocence and he feels like he’s going to blow up. There’s a difference. ]
Your hands… are real warm, you know. [ Your Innocence is just cold, babe. ]
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Date: 2026-03-14 12:03 am (UTC)Ah...I apologize. I needed to remove my gloves to cook.
[That. That's not-]
Are they too cold?
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Date: 2026-03-14 12:20 am (UTC)Goodness, no. It's my hand is always sort of cool to touch. But it isn't unpleasant, it just makes warmer things so much more noticeable on me.
[ Allen leans back here, looking fully up to see Link as the top of his head bops against Link's chest, then he lifts both arms over his head to place both hands on Link's cheeks.
And then he squishes them to make his lips puckered. ]
Hehe. Say "Chubby Bunny".
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Date: 2026-03-14 01:11 am (UTC)Link blinks, looking down at Allen as he leans back with his head against his chest...only to stiffen when Allen suddenly smooshes his hands against his cheeks as he does.]
Mmfh-h?
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Date: 2026-03-14 01:30 am (UTC)Oh, you'll suck at it when we actually do play that game, you know~!
[ He lets go with a gentle pinch against his cheeks, and rolls himself to stand upright again. ]
Alright! How many more eggs do we have? I'm feeling confident about this next one, for sure!!!
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Date: 2026-03-14 01:39 am (UTC)...
Warm? Soft? What is this feeling.
Weird. Anyway-
Link shakes his head a little, then looks to the carton.]
About a half dozen. We'll be making a lot of french toast.
[Which Allen will make sure does NOT go to waste, no worries.]
Give it a go.
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Date: 2026-03-14 01:45 am (UTC)Allen picks up an egg, and it slips from his fingers and smashes into the floor. Link, help- ]
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Date: 2026-03-14 01:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2026-03-14 01:55 am (UTC)[ He clears his throat, and reaches for another egg.
He doesn't drop this one. He also doesn't crack it amazingly??? He does the technique that Link showed him well enough, but the execution just kind of goes poorly. The egg ends up in the bowl, but there's shell bits in there. ]
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